Success In Teamwork

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bro. Randy Sanders

I happened across an advertisement for a backyard-sized commercial smoker, used, for just over half of the retail price.  Of course, you know I purchased it.  Uh oh, now I have to move this beast that weighs well over 300 pounds across half the state of Missouri.  I reached out to a few friends and Brothers, and within hours I had a crew of Andrew, Jason, and Elieser confirmed to make a 6-hour excursion to retrieve and install a rather large charcoal smoker.  A huge shout out of thanks to Brother Glenn who let me borrow his trailer. 

The crew came together from several different parts of my life, and they hadn’t previously met.  This was surprising to me as I don’t consider my life to be compartmentalized, but it just happened that way.  The crew was introduced, we drove through a Mcdonald's for an early breakfast on the road, and the crew got to know each other over the miles as we drove to pick up the smoker.  This turned out to be less of a chore than expected, as the smoker was well designed with oversized wheels and easy handles to use for maneuvering.  We strapped it down to the trailer so well it would make a loadmaster proud, and the conversation on the way back was even better than the initial meet-n-greet. 

I am blessed to have such friends and Brothers, and these gentlemen displayed teamwork and applied their experience in many ways.  They assessed the situation, observed obstacles to be overcome, removed or remedied the obstacles, created a plan to move forward, and executed the plan with only one minor adjustment made on the fly.  I couldn’t be prouder to showcase such dedication and teamwork in relating to this event, and I believe it applies to our everyday Masonic objectives. 

 We Masons meet with a bonding of fraternal ties.  We work together within this fraternity, doing together what we as individuals may struggle to accomplish.  We make something greater than the sum of the parts of our individuality.  There showcases the lesson.

 Just as my Brothers and friends came together to assist me in a task, we took away something greater than the task itself.  We took away an experience, a moment in time, where we met, found commonality and friendship, and worked together to accomplish a goal.  I see the need in Freemasonry to approach membership in committees in the same light.  I see the need to partner with our Grand Officers, Masters, and Wardens in the same light.  I see the need to partner with our external outreach to charity and other functions in that same light of teamwork and joy. 

The other message of “just show up” also came to me.  We four came together on a cool, crisp morning to work together in teamwork helping accomplish something that one, me, would have struggled to accomplish alone.  Whether it be manning the booth at a county fair, helping cook spaghetti or pancakes, or sitting at a table to hand out promotional materials, it matters not.  Our gift is the fraternity of working with each other to be part of the greater good.

The smoker’s first firing was excellent.  As I work to master the design, the venting, and the baffles, I also make the plans to invite Andrew, Jason, and Eli over to sample the tasty results of their efforts.  I believe we should rethink how committees and groups are meeting in this busy world.  We should consider meeting over dinner or at least meeting socially while focusing on the goal of the meeting.  The rewards of the efforts, while in the fraternity of the task, should always be recognized and celebrated too, right?

~RS

Randy and his wife Elyana live near St. Louis, Missouri, USA. Randy earned a bachelor's Degree in Chemistry with an emphasis in Biochemistry, and he works in Telecom IT management. He volunteers as a professional and personal mentor, NRA certified Chief Range Safety Officer, and enjoys competitive tactical pistol, rifle, and shotgun. He has 30-plus years of teaching Wing Chun Kung Fu, Chi Kung, and healing arts. Randy served as a Logistics Section Chief on two different United States federal Disaster Medical Assistance Teams over a 12-year span. Randy is a 32nd-degree KCCH and Knight Templar. His Masonic bio includes past Lodge Education Officer for two symbolic lodges, Founder of the Wentzville Lodge Book Club, member of the Grand Lodge of Missouri Education Committee, Sovereign Master of the E. F. Coonrod AMD Council No. 493, Co-Librarian of the Scottish Rite Valley of St. Louis, Clerk for the Academy of Reflection through the Valley of Guthrie, and a Facilitator for the Masonic Legacy Society. Randy is a founding administrator for Refracted Light, a full contributor to Midnight Freemasons, and an international presenter on esoteric topics. Randy hosts an open ongoing weekly Masonic virtual Happy Hour on Friday evenings. Randy is an accomplished home chef, a certified barbecue judge, raises Great Pyrenees dogs, and enjoys travel and philosophy.

Brothers for Life

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bro. Michael Arce

(Photo l to r: WB Patrick M. Connor, Jr. and Bro. Michael T. Arce)

Most of my closest friends in life are my fellow Brother Masons. These men are a diverse group, literally touching every culture, lifestyle, political, and religious background. I also have a Brother, who always joked about being brothers someday --- back when we were college roommates. Patrick Connor played lacrosse and was a fine arts major at the University of Arizona when we met. I was the guy who rented the last room in our house. That year in Tucson, Pat and I spent many late nights talking about our two favorite subjects: our dreams and life. 

Even the best-made plans are subject to change. Instead of finishing my degree, I moved from Tucson to Albany, New York, to begin my life. Pat's journey eventually led him to Rhode Island. Pat was the best man at my wedding, and I was honored to be his. With miles between us, we stayed connected through our new lives. When I share my Masonic story, I say with a smile that Pat is why I petitioned a Lodge. "Mike, I know how much you like history. I remember all of our late night talks about life. You would get so much out of this," he would tell me about Freemasonry. I eventually discovered the calling in my heart to visit the Lodge building I would stare at during red lights. Pat was the first person I called after my first visit.

There is a five-year difference in the start of our Masonic journeys. When I was struggling to make time to study the degree proficiencies, Pat was the Master Mason with the calm voice of reason that encouraged me to keep pressing on. I was excited when he was elected a Junior Warden of his Lodge; he congratulated me years later when I took my place in the South. I circled the year he would be elected Master in my calendar; nothing would keep me from visiting his Lodge. That year was 2020. 

Like everything else this year, my visit was in doubt as Lodge meetings moved to computer screens during the shutdown. There was a glimmer of hope in July that his jurisdiction would be reopening Lodges for meetings. The same day that I reached out to my Grand Lodge to arrange for my visit to Harmony Lodge #9 in Cranston, Rhode Island --- New York Governor Mario Cuomo put Rhode Island on our state's quarantine list. Another delay in a year of postponements, I thought. By mid-August, Rhode Island was off the list, and my visit was cleared!

Harmony Lodge was having their first meeting since the pandemic the evening I attended. I was warmly welcomed by the Brothers and sat in awe of the top-notch ritual work in Opening and Closing their Lodge. What made the evening truly memorable was when my best friend, the Worshipful Master, invited me to a seat in the East. During my introduction, he said, "Michael was like my brother before you, my Brothers." I sat next to him that evening, thinking of the magnitude of the moment. Just over twenty years ago, two strangers became best friends and now shared a unique bond as Freemasons.

I'd like to say that the evening's highpoint was visiting Harmony Lodge #9; it has been beautifully restored. Meeting the Brethern was also notable. I hope to travel again as a speaker one evening! The most precious memory of my trip happened after the meeting. Instead of staying up into the early hours of the morning discussing the future and life, we spoke of ritual and Masonry. We shared those parts of degree work and Masonic teachings that can only be communicated with another Brother Mason. Knowing that I will always have my best friend as a Brother for life that I can share this experience brought new meaning to The Tyler's Toast.

"Happy to meet, sorry to part, happy to meet again."
~MA

Brother Michael Arce is a member of Mt. Vernon Lodge #3 in Albany, New York. When not in Lodge, Bro. Arce is the Marketing Manager for Capital Cardiology Associates in Albany, New York. He enjoys meeting new Brothers and hearing how the Craft has enriched their lives. He can be reached at michael.arce@me.com

Expect no applause

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bro. Erik Marks

The 57th point of mind training is clear: a virtuous life is not about me or my self-aggrandizement. In my opinion, the teaching of Shantideva have a lot in common with, and to expand upon, the symbolic understanding of the practice of freemasonry. In attempting to fully live my obligations this year, I realized my eager acceptance to write for the Midnight Freemasons had more to do with my ego (in lay-person’s terms) than service to humanity. Therefore, please accept this post as my humble resignation. There are brothers with far more experience in both freemasonry and mental health to speak to the issues in life, culture, and our craft, than me.

I am grateful to Brothers Johnson, Creason, and Lahners for allowing me a platform to attempt to express how I believe Freemasonry is relevant to men in our current iteration of culture. For the handful of brothers I have come to know through this forum, I am tremendously grateful to have made your acquaintance and we will stay in touch. My aspiration for us all is to use the tools provided to examine our actions with unflinching honesty and to govern ourselves accordingly. SMIB.  

 

~EM

Brother Erik Marks is a clinical social worker whose usual vocation has been in the field of human services in a wide range of settings since 1990. He was raised in 2017 by his biologically younger Brother and then Worshipful Master in Alpha Lodge in Framingham, MA. You may contact brother Marks by email: erik@StrongGrip.org

 

 

Virtual Friendship, Real Life Brotherhood

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bill Hosler, PM

 

From Left to Right: Greg Knott, Bill Hosler, Darin Lahners (Back), Todd E. Creason

 

Every Freemason knows that feeling. That feeling when you are out in public, often with your wife or partner and another Mason will approach you and mumble a couple of words, and the next thing you know both of you are smiling and shaking hands and talking. A few minutes later your significant other will ask you ”Does he belong to your lodge?” and you reply back ”Nope. Never met him before.” It’s a feeling that even though you never met the man before you share something in common that makes you feel like you have known him all your life. It’s not something you can explain and seems weird to others but it is a special thing between brothers.

Not long ago, I had the opportunity to visit Saint Joseph Lodge #970 in Saint Joseph Illinois. The lodge is located in a century old building that meets about a coffee shop in the downtown area of a small town full of shops, restaurants and a winery in main street America. It’s a vital part of this beautiful little town near Champaign. 

As wonderful as the town was the real reason I was visiting this lodge was to finally meet in person several of the Brethren I have been working with for over a half decade.

 

 Greg Knott and Bill Hosler

This little town is where I was to meet Midnight Freemasons and fellow co-hosts of the podcast Meet, Act and Part, Todd Creason, Greg Knott, and Darin Lahners. After all these years we were all physically going to be in the same room and attend the same lodge together. I was excited since this is only the second time I’ve met a Midnight Freemason in real life since I met Steve Harrison when he drove through my little Oklahoma town a few years ago. 

Todd E. Creason and Bill Hosler

 

That afternoon, Greg Knott picked me up at my hotel and after meeting Darin, we had a great dinner outside at Roch's where I was able to try a local Illinois delicacy called a ”The Horseshoe” (Google it). We spent a great meal talking and laughing after the meal was done we walked the half block to the lodge building.

Bill Hosler and WM Darin Lahners

 

Since Darin is the Master of the lodge this year I watched him open the lodge, while Greg and Todd served as Stewards for the evening. As always when you visit a foreign jurisdiction you look for the differences and similarities to the ritual you learned. 

Once the business of the lodge had been completed, Worshipful Brother Lahners asked me to approach the East. Brother Lahners presented me with a lodge lapel on Saint Joe had commissioned during the year Greg Knott was Master of the lodge and Saint Joe had the honor of winning the Mark Twain Award for Excellence in Masonic Awareness. It was a beautiful pin and I will keep it as a souvenir and as a reminder of such a great evening. 

 

WM Lahners presents Bill Hosler with a lapel pin

After the meeting, the group of us stood in the parking lot and talked for a little while. Discussing future plans for the podcast and the possibility of getting us all together in one place for a symposium type meeting. It’s amazing how we all work together, for years now connected by light and fiber optic cables all over from our locations all over the work the transformational real life was seamless. As if we all have been next door neighbors for decades.

One thing we all agreed on the time we all had together was too short and we would all have to get together again very soon.  Much like the line in the Tyler's toast used in English festive boards ”Happy to meet, sorry to part, happy to meet again.” 

 

~BH

WB Bill Hosler was made a Master Mason in 2002 in Three Rivers Lodge #733 in Indiana. He served as Worshipful Master in 2007 and became a member of the internet committee for Indiana's Grand Lodge. Bill is currently a member of Roff Lodge No. 169 in Roff Oklahoma and Lebanon Lodge No. 837 in Frisco, Texas. Bill is also a member of the Valley of Fort Wayne Ancient Accepted Scottish Rite in Indiana. A typical active Freemason, Bill also served as the High Priest of Fort Wayne's Chapter of the York Rite No. 19 and was commander of the Fort Wayne Commandery No. 4 of the Knight Templar. During all this, he also served as the webmaster and magazine editor for the Mizpah Shrine in Fort Wayne Indiana.

Going Back to Lodge

By Midnight Freemasons Senior Contributor

W.B. Gregory J. Knott

It’s been over four months since I last attended an in person meeting at our local lodge. So when fellow Midnight Freemason Darin Lahners and my son Hayden recently went to St. Joseph Lodge No. 970 to perform a deep cleaning, it was like seeing an old friend again. Everything was there just as we had left it after the last stated meeting.

As we did the sweeping, dusting and deep cleaning, I couldn’t help but think about all the great times I have had in that lodge over the last decade. I had met numerous new brothers, we had brought the lodge back from the brink of closure and been very active in the community.

As Worshipful Brother Lahners outlined in his last piece our lodge has lost some momentum and some of those brothers we had raised over the last decade had faded away, moved away or simply left Freemasonry. As WB Lahners once again goes to the East, we will have some work to do in once again energizing the lodge.

I have to be honest and say that over the last few weeks I have thought maybe it would just be easier to turn the lights out and merge with another nearby lodge. But I keep coming back to the impact St. Joseph Lodge has had in our local community since 1914. In this day and age, once the lights go dark, more than likely they will never be turned back on again.

It’s not that you should work to keep the lights on just for the sake of keeping the lodge tradition going, rather I believe that local lodges can be a source of personal growth for those men seeking to make themselves better. In turn these men go into the local community and are active in their churches, schools, scouting units, local government etc. In other words we offer a value proposition that can serve as a vital link in bettering individuals who in turn better their communities.

So as we return from a post COVID-19 break, take a moment and think about what role your lodge can play in helping to support the community. Look around for those men that could benefit from what Freemasonry can offer. How can your lodge offer programs that help men grow? What support can you give your brethren, some of whom may have had personal difficulties over the last few weeks.

We finished our cleaning of the lodge room and it’s ready for the membership to return. I am ready to return and see my friends and brothers. I wish you and your lodge great success as we resume our labors.

~GJK

WB Gregory J. Knott is a founding member and Senior Contributor of the Midnight Freemasons blog.  He is a Past Master of St. Joseph Lodge No. 970 in St. Joseph (IL) and a plural member of Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL), Homer Lodge No. 199 (IL) and Naval Lodge No. 4 in Washington, DC. He’s a member of the Scottish Rite, the York Rite, Eastern Star and is the Charter Secretary of the Illini High Twelve Club No. 768 in Champaign-Urbana. He is also a member of ANSAR Shrine (IL) and the Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees. Greg serves on the Board of Directors of The Masonic Society and is a member of the Scottish Rite Research Society and The Philathes Society. He is a charter member of a new Illinois Royal Arch Chapter, Admiration Chapter U.D. and serves as its Secretary. Greg is very involved in Boy Scouts—an Eagle Scout himself, he is a member of the National Association of Masonic Scouters. You can contact him at gknott63@gmail.com

Sharing the special bond of Freemasonry

By Bro. Michael Arce

(left to right) Bro. David McIntosh, Bro. Matt McIntosh, and Bro. Christopher McIntosh at Matt’s raising in 2013

We spend our early years looking up to our father. Dad is our symbol of strength and wisdom. He could throw us in the air for hours; it took him seconds to fix our broken toys. We'd struggle to walk in his shoes with our tiny feet! In those early years, we would try to be like the most important man in our life. For most young men, there are also those teenage years where we swear, "I will never be like him." But we realize after reaching adulthood that as much as we tried to be different, we couldn't escape certain physical qualities. And when you reach that point in life where you start a relationship with your inner-self, you realize there are inherent traits you share with your father that could only have been passed along from birth.

As we prepare to make phone calls to the most important men in our lives this weekend or cherish breakfast and Father's Day gifts from our family, I can't help and think, my Brothers, of that special bond that so few of us share. Fathers and their sons who are held to a deeper tie through Freemasonry. We know that our obligations extend beyond a similar passion for the same sports team or attending the same college/university. How extraordinary a Masonic connection must be; to share a bond deep in history, knowledge, and tradition.

"You know, my dad and grandfather were from the old school of Freemasonry, if you weren't a Mason, they wouldn't talk with you about it," shared Bro. Matthew McIntosh, Morgantown Union Lodge #4 of the Grand Lodge of West Virginia. "I remember when I was younger, asking about his Masonic ring at one point. 'What's that ring mean?' My father told me, 'well, if you're a good man, maybe one day you will find out.' I grew up in Grafton (West Virginia). My brother and I were pretty naive growing up; we saw the letter 'G' and thought you had to be from Grafton to wear that ring!"

I enjoyed a special conversation with Bro. McIntosh on the unique link between family men who are also Brother Masons. I believe that every father hopes that someday, he will share our path to Freemasonry. As the father of a thirteen-year-old son, I think about this the more time I spent with my son. My son, Mikey, asks me the same questions I posed to my dad. As adolescents, we investigate to learn what our father's life was like when he was our age. I wanted to know about The Beatles, where my dad was when Kennedy was shot and how he felt during the Vietnam War. My son wants to know if Michael Jordan was really the greatest basketball player of all time (he was), how did I watch movies before Netflix (it was called a VCR), and giggles when I talk about having a full head of hair.

Not once has he asked about Freemasonry, my Lodge, or anything about being a Mason. Sure, he's spent time with Brothers from my Lodge, he's even attended an officer installation. That is when he asked why I wore a "skirt" (his words, not mine) and was fascinated with "the guy who gets to hold the sword." But there were no questions on what I do as a Mason or any interest in the subject. I find it difficult to talk with my adult friends about Masonry. It is close to impossible to bring up the topic with my son. As the first of my family to become a Master Mason, I can only hope that my son would pursue my course in searching for Masonic light. I found encouragement from Bro. McIntosh.

"I came into Masonry later in life, I thought you had to be invited to be a Masonry, I didn't know you had to ask," said Bro. McIntosh. Matt shared with me the history of his grandfather (Arnold) and his grandfather's brother going through the degree work together in 1951, receiving their 50-year pins in 2001. "That was a big deal, my uncle came to visit for that," he added. His grandfather was also a Scottish Rite Mason. Matt's father (David) would eventually follow in his father's footsteps. Matt's brother also joined the Craft before Matt sought a petition. Unfortunately, Matt's grandfather laid down his Working Tools before Matt was raised. "I wish Pap-pa could be here for this," he recalls telling his father before his 3rd degree. "Oh, he'll be there," his father replied. Matt thought that meant in spirit. "It gets me emotional just thinking about this. After I was raised, my dad presented me with my grandfather's ring. There wasn't a dry eye in the Lodge."

That ring is a family heirloom that Bro. McIntosh hopes to pass along to his seven-year-old grandson. "He's already interested; the spark is there," Matt confirmed. His grandson has asked about Matt dressing up for lodge meetings, has tried on his Shriner cap, and loves his Knights Templar regalia. "Especially the sword, but I won't let him hold it yet."

Our conversation drifted back into the role that Masons play in the lives of those around us. It's not uncommon to hear from candidates interested in petitioning a lodge that a Mason made a profound impression in their life at a young age. Bro. McIntosh summed up this connection beautifully. "I was always surrounded by Masons, and I didn't know it. They helped influence who I am. I think being raised by Masons, you're instilled with those values that you pass along. You want your son to be a better man. You are bringing him up to be a Mason, whether he knows it or not."

To those Brothers who are celebrating today, Happy Father's Day.

~MA

Brother Michael Arce is the Junior Warden of St. George’s #6, Schenectady and a member of Mt. Zion #311, Troy New York. When not in Lodge, Bro. Arce is the Marketing Manager for Capital Cardiology Associates in Albany, New York. He enjoys meeting new Brothers and hearing how the Craft has enriched their lives. He can be reached at: michael.arce@me.com

Discomfort in uncertainty

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bro. Erik Marks

This will be brief. I want this post to be brief because I don’t want to muddle the message. From the start of my journey in Freemasonry, there was uncertainty. What will happen next to me next? I could have turned away from the unknown and uncertainty, not knowing what would happen. That would have been bad. Freemasonry has support for uncertainty because we have one another. Even if we disagree on this or that, there is the possibility of withstanding uncertainty together. Withstanding doesn’t mean comfort, necessarily. When we work to change ourselves, it is uncomfortable, there is discomfort and there is a lot of uncertainty. “If I break off this part, this habit, this idea, this ideology, what will happen to me?"

Then I realize I don’t have to worry, I’m not alone. I can see my cherished individualism may be a barrier to greater knowledge. Therefore, I lean into the collective for support to help me change, myself. There is a lot of uncertainty in the world. The uncertainty can be good. However, it can feel uncomfortable and it can cause me to be reactive, rash, and impulsive or reflexively try to get back to former comfortable ideas—to hide in old ideas, behaviors— to get away from the light. That would be bad.

So, I hope when each of us feels discomfort in uncertainty, we will take long slow breaths, and turn to one another. Next, that we will lean on the symbols, tools, and structures, and talk it out. If we are willing to do so while managing and maintaining our inner harmony, we will learn and grow individually and collectively; of that I am certain.

~EM

Brother Erik Marks is a clinical social worker whose usual vocation has been in the field of human services in a wide range of settings since 1990. He was raised in 2017 by his biologically younger Brother and then Worshipful Master in Alpha Lodge in Framingham, MA. You may contact brother Marks by email: erik@StrongGrip.org

The Perils of the Perfect Ashlar

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

WB Robert E. Jackson

Several months ago, I started a journey. I was on a path to research the mysteries of Masonry and life in general, meditating daily, studying the blogs and making sure that I read something every day. I was in search of the Perfect Ashlar, and I was determined to get there. It wasn't for notoriety, or fame, or to be some master guru, it was just to be better. I needed to be better. My friends and Brothers deserved a better me. My wife and kids, my family, deserved a better me. The problem was, it wasn't me.

I was convinced that every mistake I made, every wrong turn, was another part of the rough ashlar that needed to be processed. The path became a series of checklists, and each task marked complete meant being closer to that perfect ashlar. Each task not complete, drove me deep into the recesses of that rough ashlar into both a figurative and literal, depression. That mental state was viewed as yet another imperfection of the ashlar, driving me further down into a horrible cycle. It was as if I was following a map, a path to enlightenment. Every wrong term, every missed step, needed to result in punishment, or I would be doomed to make the mistake again. It all simply told me that I just wasn't working hard enough.

This impacted every aspect of my life…as a Brother, as a Scoutmaster, husband, father, friend, etc. Every interaction was an apology, another area where I fell short of what my false self was telling me to be. I very quickly found out that one of the driving factors behind this obsession, was a massive fear of rejection. Friends, colleagues, family, will see me as less than what I am…God forbid they would see me for who I really am. And my kids…my kids deserve so much better. They deserve a better Father, the best that anybody could be. However, that strive to be the best ends up as unrealistic expectations placed upon their souls. By demonstrating this urge for perfection, my fear of negatively impacting them was coming to fruition. The very thing I was afraid of was happening.

So, I turned to therapy. I took a break from all education that wasn't related to figuring out what was going on…anything Masonic, work, or Scouting related that wasn’t urgent, had to be put on hold. After years of telling people that our brains are our own worst enemies, I had no choice but to see this in myself. One of the first books I read, Whole Again by Jackson MacKenzie, revealed quite a bit. This can be dangerous, however, because there is always the possibility of contracting "Medical Students' Disease." For those not familiar, this is the phenomenon, often seen in medical students, where they are immediately inflicted with every disease and issue they read about. There was one particular section, however, related to perfectionism, where it felt like I was reading a story about my self. 

 
The perfectionist struggles daily with expecting things to be the way they are "supposed to be." There is some obsessive compulsive tendency here (like wanting dishes to be organized in a specific way). However, the majority of the feelings are around self loathing, and resentment. I can certainly see how the resentment can ruin relationships for those that are vocal about their needs and desires. Projects and tasks should be performed in a certain way. Any tasks I complete, must be maintained exactly as how I've done it (again, reference dishes). When combined with the self loathing, however, every time a task wasn't done as I felt it should be done, it became my personal problem. Either I would recognize that the inability to accept other implementations was another fracture in my rough ashlar. Or in some cases, I would blame myself for not communicating my intentions well enough. Certainly there were successes and great accomplishments, but those all belonged to my team members or partners. I was not permitted to enjoy the success…as it wasn't mine.

Another battle of the perfectionist is the take on as many new projects as possible. This was completely obvious in my life, and I can't remember a time where I didn't take on whatever was thrown at me. Looking back, in college, this actually resulted in a physical battle with mononucleosis that lasted over a month. I couldn't give up though. I couldn't stop, no matter how much I was hurt…just like an addiction. Something inside my mind kept pushing me for the next project, the next contribution, for if I was able to do more, I would be more indispensable. I could become not just the perfect ashlar, but the corner stone! That same corner stone that was rejected so many times.

At this point, I feel it necessary to explain that there is a significant difference between seeking sympathy, wanting the 'pity party', and self loathing. The former seeks the attention, the assistance, while the latter hides behind the smiles and laughter. Self loathing often results in seclusion, and withdrawal from society, even though the camaraderie might be what we need most. Thinking about the law of attraction, and the impacts our feelings have on others, there is a fear (yup, another fear) that by introducing ourselves into a concert or meeting when we aren't in the "right mind" may end up negatively impacting others. At one point, I almost skipped our Lodge of Instruction (a monthly district gathering we have in Massachusetts). My good friend, Brother, and Midnight Freemason contributor Erik Marks was speaking. I was so looking forward to this lecture, but I didn't want to poison the room, so I was going to stay home. I forced myself to go, and I left that meeting a different person. Not just his presentation about meditation and contemplative thought, but simply being there with my Brothers made such an impact. I was also able to speak with some of my Brothers about my struggles, trying to understand the difference between Self Compassion, and Self Centeredness. This distinction continues to be a struggle.

We often talk about the Ego - the inner mind. For most of my life. I was convinced that our Ego was merely the inner self that was the antithesis to Charity. From the King James Bible, 1 Corinthians 13:5 states that,

 "Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;"

 Our Ego is self promotional, overbearing, pushing down others to make us feel better. I was so convinced that this was the only possible existence of Ego, my way of battling the Ego was to attempt to eliminate any aspect of selfishness. Ultimately this led the path to Echoism, and I was convinced that this was my way. This was how I was to serve mankind, and if I screwed up, it became a personal failure. Eventually the depression of not letting go of the past, transformed into an anxiety of making the wrong decisions in the future. At some points, the anxiety became debilitating, and once again, the fear became reality.

Eventually, with help, I realized that this was exactly what my Ego was doing. What makes me so special? I truly believe that there is a sense of divinity in us all. An unfettering compassion and love that is to be shared with others, and that's what makes us beautiful. I couldn't believe that I had it, because I'm fundamentally flawed. But what makes me so special to be imperfect and not worthy of this love, when so many others, even people I just met, are deserving of the love and compassion that I can offer?

Ryan Flynn has some amazing presentations…one of my favorite's is the Divine Master. 

Brother Flynn was talking about Michelangelo's early life, some of the people he kept company with, and learned from, and of course some of his greatest works of art. This is such a thought provoking presentation, and really enforces the idea of 'hidden in plain sight.' I truly love some of the linkages between our lessons of today, and those of the very distant past. At one point, Brother Flynn discussed the rough and perfect ashlars, and alchemy, and transformation, and simply making yourself better. Sometimes that ashlar appears to be so rough, it's hard to imagine that ever becoming even close to something beautiful. And yet, the amazing marble that was used to carve Michelangelo's David, possibly one of his most famous works, was discarded, judged by other artists to be useless. I’m certainly not comparing myself to the amazing artists of the renaissance, but at that point in time, I realized that I dismissed my own ashlar. Brother Flynn mentioned a very inspiring quote from Michelangelo…

"Every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it.

I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free."

I couldn't believe that there was such beauty inside of me. There I was, surrounded by my Brothers, and one of my favorite speakers, and I was drifting off, because the Ego was once again taking control. On my way home, I continued to think about this quote. There is a beauty within us all-- including me. I started again down that dangerous path, though. "If I get to this point, I'll be better. Once I perfect this lecture, I'll be a better Mason. Once I attain enlightenment, I'll be healthier. Once I read this book, I'll be smarter."

Another book I was introduced to along the path, was Eckhart Tolle's, The Power of Now. This book had a great impact with a very dear friend of mine (not a Mason), but after reading I learned that several Masons that I admire have incorporated many of the concepts of this book. Tolle speaks of time as a fabrication of man. Within the animal kingdom, we are the only beings (that we know of) that ruminate over the past, and fear the future. The only point in time that matters to any of us, is right now, this very moment, this very breath. Once we can let go of "when I can…I'll be happy," only then can we truly be happy. I could understand the concept, but again, application of that tool eluded me. It was as if I was in the LEGO movie, looking for the instructional books as I was not yet a 'master builder'. If only I could attain enlightenment. That simple statement, that goal, was putting me back into mind, time, and removed me from the Now. One of my favorite lines from this book, so far, is,

"The past is the past, and there isn't anything that can be done to change that. The future is the future, and whatever happens, will happen."

I still struggle, every day. Even writing this paper caused me to reflect greatly on past behavior. Additionally, there remains a part of me that believes that by overcoming this obsessive quest for the Perfect Ashlar, I can be a better Brother, Scoutmaster, Father, Husband, Friend. I am learning, though, that the kindness and Love that you give to others will never last, if you don't have kindness and Love for yourself.

~REJ

Robert Edward Jackson is a Past Master and Secretary of Montgomery Lodge located in Milford, MA. His Masonic lineage includes his Father (Robert Maitland), Grandfather (Maitland Garrecht), and Great Grandfather (Edward Henry Jackson), a founding member of Scarsdale Lodge #1094 in Scarsdale, NY. When not studying ritual, he's busy being a father to his three kids, a husband, Boy Scout Leader, and a network engineer to pay for it all. He can be reached at info@montgomerylodge.org

A Mason Walkin' In Memphis

 by Midnight Freemasons Founder

Todd E. Creason, 33°

Marlowe's Restaurant sends a pink Cadillac limo to pick you up at your hotel when you're hungry. We couldn't seem to get enough of the wonderful local cuisine in Memphis, Tennessee. If you couldn't tell by our clothes, this was July 4th.  Left to right: Valerie, Katie, & Todd Creason

We'd never been to Memphis before, so this year we decided to take our annual 4th of July trip to Tennessee.  And since we were driving this time instead of flying, I decided to try and little experiment--I wore my Mason cap the whole week just to see how many comments I got as we traveled through Illinois, Missouri, Arkansas, and into Memphis, Tennessee.  Of course we did all the tourist stuff so we were enjoying these sites with other tourists: Graceland, Memphis Zoo, Beale Street, Redbird Stadium, Bass Pro Shoppe at the Pyramid,

We hadn't even gotten out of Illinois when I got the first remark.  We stopped for breakfast in Salem, Illinois at a Denny's when the waitress filled my coffee and said, "my dad's a Mason."

A couple hours later we bought gas at a truck-stop in Arkansas.  I went in to get coffee and when I went to pay for it, the cashier waved me by.  I looked at him questioningly, and he pointed to his ring and smiled.

At the Graceland Guesthouse when I checked in, the guy at the check-in desk asked me if Elvis was a Freemason.  I told him he wasn't.  "Well that kind of surprises me," he remarked.  "You guys have some nice looking jewelry, and he sure liked jewelry."

When we called Marlowe's for the pink Cadillac limo to take us to dinner (Marlowe's has some fantastic food and we ate there a couple times) the driver shook my hand in a very familiar way when we got out of the car.  Never said anything, and wasn't wearing a ring, but it was pretty clear he was a Mason.

At the Bass Pro Shop at the iconic pyramid downtown (only Bass Pro Shop I've ever been to that had valet parking), one of the security guards was a Mason, and during our discussion we learned he was a very smart man--from Illinois and a huge Chicago Cubs fan!

At a Mexican Restaurant we dined at, I got the question, "Isn't your name Hiram?"

There were a couple others--one at this huge fireworks store in Arkansas on the way home called "Boomtown" and one at the Memphis Redbirds Stadium.  I was a little surprised at how many times I was approached.  I think we've all had that experience of somebody seeing our ring, or a hat, or emblems on our car and walking up to us.  But it never ceases to amaze me how many times this happens considering just how small in numbers our Fraternity is compared to the population.

And maybe it's just that Masons are friendly people and are always anxious to meet another Brother.  I have very seldom ever passed up an opportunity to meet a Brother when I've seen a ring, a hat, or a Masonic license plate.  My youngest daughter is 12, and she picks out those Masonic symbols as quickly as I do . . . Dad!  Look!  That guy's got a Masonic tattoo!  Go find out where he's from!

And I almost always do.

Next time you go on a trip or on a vacation, try it.  It's pretty amazing the diversity of people you'll meet, and the stories you'll hear just because of this one common Brotherhood we all share.  In the end we're just all one big happy family!

So please, feel free to share your favorite "Masonic Encounter" in the comments!

~TEC

Todd E. Creason, 33° is the Founder of the Midnight Freemasons blog, and an award winning author of several books and novels, including the Famous American Freemasons series. Todd started the Midnight Freemason blog in 2006, and in 2012 he opened it up as a contributor blog The Midnight Freemasons (plural). Todd has written more than 1,000 pieces for the blog since it began. He is a Past Master of Homer Lodge No. 199 and Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL) where he currently serves as Secretary. He is a Past Sovereign Master of the Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees. He is a Fellow at the Missouri Lodge of Research (FMLR). He is a charter member of the a new Illinois Royal Arch Chapter, Admiration Chapter No. 282 and currently serves as EHP. You can contact him at: webmaster@toddcreason.org