The Flat Earth And Other Masonic Secrets

by Midnight Freemasons Contributor
WM Darin A. Lahners

Freemasons have been and will continue to be a target for conspiracy theorists because we are as they say, a secret society.  As a freemason, and an avid follower of conspiracy theories, I guess I fall into the category of a hypocrite.  For me, reading about and researching conspiracy theories is a way to unwind, and to often laugh at the ridiculousness of the human imagination.   This being said, there are some conspiracy theories that I somewhat subscribe to.  I do believe that there was a conspiracy to kill JFK, I believe that not all of the official story of 9/11 is true, especially surrounding what caused Building 7 of the World Trade Center to come down, and I believe that it’s possible that technologically advanced extraterrestrial life could be visiting us.   So be forewarned, I’m obviously a tinfoil hat wearing nut. 

One of the things that we are hiding as Freemasons, apart from the location of Solomon’s Treasure, the Ark of Covenant, and numerous other secrets, is the fact that the earth is flat.  This is according to many supporters and believers in the flat earth.  The reasons that they believe in the flat earth are numerous.  Many of them are religious fundamentalists, and take the bible verbatim.  In the KJV of the bible, in Genesis, the creation story says that the earth is covered by a vault (firmament) and the celestial bodies move inside the vault.  They believe that the Sun and the Moon are smaller bodies roughly the same size which are near (3000 miles) the earth.  You can read a pretty good summary of what they subscribe to here:

If you’re on the fence still, please read this:

However, I want to deal with why they believe that Freemasons are involved in hiding the flat earth.  One of the main tenets of flat earth belief is that the theory of Gravity is a lie.  Furthermore, Sir Isaac Newton was a Freemason, and the Freemasonic Royal Society has been pushing this lie since its inception.  Although there is no definitive information about Newton being a Freemason, it’s obvious that he is.  His hand in both of the below portraits display this, because he’s apparently giving the Masonic M hand sign.  You know the one, right?    M = Mason!!!!!  

Now in all fairness, Newton was a member of the Royal Society, which was founded by Christopher Wren, who may or may not have been a Freemason.  (The United Grand Lodge of England website doesn’t list him as one but The Grand Lodge of British Columbia and Yukon in Canada says he was.)  There have also been many members of the Royal Society who were in fact Freemasons, such as John Desaguliers, who is regarded as the father of the Grand Lodge System.  Anyway, Gravity is a lie made up by the Freemason Newton to hide the fact that the earth is flat.   You heard it here first.  Don’t get me started on Einstein.  Total Freemason, even though even though there is no record of him being one.   I believe this circa late 90’s website lists both he and Newton!  (PS: Masonic Lodge 56, do your homework!)   

In fact, the whole Heliocentric model of the Universe is a lie.   The flat earth is the center of the universe.   Those who promote the Heliocentric Model are Freemasons.   

I have proof:

Yes, anytime a square or compass shows up in a painting, it means that person is a Freemason. Just like every time a playing card shows up in a painting, it means that person is a professional poker player.

I mean it’s just coincidence that the square and compass can be used in mathematics.   Everyone knows that you all became Freemasons in High School Geometry.  You used a compass didn’t you?
But most importantly, since we hide everything in plain sight…. What do you think the G in the square and compass means?   Gravity.  Which we made up.  There’s no reason that you’re not floating right now.  We’ve told you this recently in the Motion Picture IT.  “You’ll float too!”  A direct reference to the Freemasons via our control of Hollywood.  So what keeps us on the ground?  Magnetism.   Yes another invisible force which like gravity depends upon the mass and attraction between two objects.  That’s not too farfetched is it?

By the way, the Freemasons apparently control NASA too.   Because we control Hollywood, and all Hollywood major players are Freemasons, it’s easy for us to make the best sci-fi films.  I mean NASA’s budget in 2016 was 19.3 Billion dollars.  We can totally make it seem like we have men in orbit on a “Space Station” above the “ball” earth with that kind of budget right?   Never mind that you can take photos of the International Space Station from the ground with the aid of telescope.  We don’t have satellites in orbit either.   GPS is just based off triangulation from ground based cell phone towers.  Don’t let the fact that I can take a dedicated GPS device on a plane flight and have it give me positional readings, airspeed and elevation at 30000 feet in the air dissuade you.  We’ve never been to space or the moon! Wake up Sheeple! Seriously, it’s all CGI.   Just ask the Masonic film directors and producers like: Spielberg, Lucas, Roddenberry, Howard, Haskin, Cameron, and Kubrick.  Once again, there’s no proof that they are Freemasons, but we should never let facts get in the way of a good conspiracy.

Yes, without a doubt, there were many Freemasons who were astronauts.   Buzz Aldrin, Gordon Cooper, Dr. Edgar Mitchell, and John Glenn were Freemasons, just to name a few.   Yes, Buzz Aldrin took a Southern Jurisdiction Flag to the moon… err film set, where fellow Freemason Stanley Kubrick directed the whole thing.  It’s not like there are any laser reflectors on the moon left by the Freemasonic Lying Astronauts that allow precise measurements of the Earth-Moon distance for the last four decades.  I mean to say that if we had the ability to measure the distance from the earth to the moon, then that would totally destroy the whole flat earth thing right?  Flat earthers believe that the earth and the moon are both 3000 miles above the plane of the earth.  It’s a complete masonic lie when the distance is measured to be at an average of 239,228.3 miles.

There is however an even more sinister way in which we Freemasons hide the flat earth from the masses.   Since we hide everything in plain sight, I present to you how you can really tell that the earth is flat……  Drumroll please.

That’s right.  Every time a masonic lodge holds a pancake breakfast, it’s reminding you sheeple of our intellectual superiority over you.  We love our pancakes as much as we love our flat earth knowledge.   The pancake is a perfect representation of the flat earth!   Pancakes are flat, the earth is flat.   Any other questions?????

I didn’t write this article to trifle with your emotions.  I would hope that I’ve not offended anyone that truly believes that the earth is flat.   Honestly, if that’s your belief, good for you.   You see, if there is one thing that being a Freemason has taught me, it’s to be tolerate towards mankind.  It’s possible that you worship a different god, or have a different favorite sports team, believe that the earth is flat, or have a different skin color or sexual orientation.  None of that matters to me.  What matters to me is that you believe in tolerance.  I think I see why many of the flat earthers use Freemasonry as a scapegoat.  It’s because they really don’t know anything about us. 

We are not a ‘secret’ society.  Yes we take an oath to not reveal certain parts of our ceremonies.  However, Most Lodge buildings are well marked with the square and compass, or other masonic markings – Like a sign that says – so and so lodge meets here on such and such night.   Anyone who meets the qualifications can join (In Illinois this means that you are 18, have never had a felony conviction, and believe in a supreme being).  You just have to ask another member about joining to join.   We don’t actively recruit members.   I know that some of the Grand Lodges have relaxed this, but for the most part, this is still the case.  So I’m breaking the golden rule right now.   I’m talking the person who stumbled upon this blog because they think I’m confirming what the dozens of flat earth YouTube videos and websites state about Masonry hiding the flat earth.   I ask you to go to your local lodge and ask to join.   What have you got to lose?  If you really want to see what our mysteries consist of, if you want to see if we’re hiding anything, then come on down.  Maybe you’ll convert some of us into believing that the earth is flat.  We won’t care one way or another once you’re a brother.  But of course, what do I know.  I’m only a 32nd Degree Scottish Rite Mason.   They tell you all the good stuff at the 33rd Degree.   

Am I right, Todd Creason????   


WB Darin A. Lahners is the Worshipful Master of St. Joseph Lodge No.970 in St. Joseph and a plural member of Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL), and Homer Lodge No. 199 (IL). He’s a member of the Scottish Rite Valley of Danville, a charter member of the new Illinois Royal Arch Chapter, Admiration Chapter U.D. and is the current Secretary of the Illini High Twelve Club No. 768 in Champaign – Urbana (IL).   He is also a member of the Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees.  When he’s not busy enjoying Masonic fellowship, Darin spends his time as a DM for his children’s D&D campaign, reading, golfing, watching movies and listening to music.  You can reach him by email at


  1. I'm not supposed to comment on things like that, Darin . . .

  2. This is quite possibly one of the most beautifully hilarious things I've read for a minute now. Spot-on parody of so much of the internet.

  3. Actually, I just re-read it. It is, like I said, a great parody of the tinfoil-fez worldview, but zags. It zags, and makes some salient points about tolerance, points that forced me to re-evaluate my own attitudes as I read.
    In other words, this is an even better piece than I'd realized. Will likely share to Facebook.


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