There's a man, walking down the street at one o'clock in the morning--he's loaded.
A policeman stops him and asks him, "where do you think you're going in that condition?"
"I'm on my way to a lecture on Freemasonry," the man slurred.
"Where can you possibly get a lecture on Freemasonry at this time of night?" the officers asks.
"From my wife, when I get home!"